Shine On, Bright One
Shine on, bright one. Shine no matter what anyone else has to say about it.
This week I was taking class when the teacher instructed us to move into a backbend. I’d been deeply listening to my body through the whole practice. I’d been following my body’s impulses and delighting in my strength and responsiveness throughout class. So, when we moved into the challenge of the backbend on the first side I continued listening, following, delighting and found myself in a deep and nourishing posture. It felt so good to be alive!
And then from behind me I heard: “Show-Off!”
There was no mistaking that the comment was directed at me and I immediately felt self-conscious about my authentic expression. We came out of the pose and moved on to the second side. And I felt myself in a conflict. I could hold back on the second side. That would make the other people around me more comfortable. I could restrain myself and apologize for the years I’ve spent on my mat and in other movement forms. I could diminish my expression, so that everyone in the room would feel good about themselves.
Or I could not. I could take a deep breath, not let her comment stop me, and go on into the delight of backbend on the second side.
I’m happy to say that I chose the second option. It was hard. The next backbend felt almost as good as the first. And I tried to continue to listen to my body. But, I have to admit I felt more self-conscious than I did on the first side. And then class moved on and I went back to listening, following, and delighting as best I could for the remainder of practice.
We’ve all been taught to hold back. We’ve been told not to brag, not to bring attention to ourselves, not to show off or show other people up. It is shameful in our culture for women especially to draw attention to ourselves. Unfortunately that leads to us making ourselves small and to restraining ourselves. It leads to diminishment rather than full expression. And whenever you hold back and diminish yourself you dim your own light.
You were born to shine, dear one! You are this one delightful expression of Life on this planet. Unique and interesting bright and shiny. You were made to be YOU in all of the wondrous ways you choose to express yourself.
Your shining may be uncomfortable for other people. They may not like it and they may call you names. And being called names that are shaming in our culture is never fun. (Like “Show off”) But really, the fact that they feel uncomfortable with how you express yourself is 100% their problem. You are not responsible for making them feel better, more comfortable, more able, more anything.
You are responsible for being yourself as clearly, authentically, and brightly as you possibly can. When you express from your true self it is never with intention to diminish another person. When you shine from within it has the possibility of giving other people permission to shine from within as well.
And wouldn’t that be something? If we could all shine fully and see each other in brightness not as a diminishment of ourselves but as an invitation to bring even more light to this world.
So, Shine On Bright One, Shine On!
Feeling uncomfortable shining? I’m happy to support you in finding the freedom to fully be yourself. Let’s schedule a coaching call to talk about it.